Monday, April 02, 2007 / 11:21 AM
Woo.. last night, I stand up and walk out to the living room and dial her number and the voicemail was talking. As usual, I called again immediately and then it was engaged. Next, my phone is ringing. She called!! (without knowing that I was calling her)
Wooo.. is our brain signal to each other so strong that we called each other at the same time, the very minute or even the very second? I woke up, and are still amazed by what happened last night. Just in case, you think this kind of scenario is nothing uncommon, think again, if it happens more than a few times with the same person. Be amazed by the works of the unseen.
Hehehe.
Could anyone just 'Missing-in-Action' (MIA) from your life without any rhyme or reason? (with reference to
Qing's blog
hee)
No. No one can just MIA from your life without any reason, though the reason might not have anything to do with you. I am almost certain that everyone experience this before, be it you are the one who cut others off ('cutter') or being cut off ('the cut'). The reason behind him/her MIA-
ing is not really important, as for whatever reason that propel it from happening, it has already happened. My best advice is that, if you are the person who got cut off, do not brood over why this person just MIA from your life (even after some effort to get this person back), and to your amazement, the 'cutter' might not even realised that he/she has already cut you off. Looking from two different angles, the 'cutter' might cut you off deliberately or unintentionally, but you will never know unless he tells you.
The best for 'the cut' to do is not to place unnecessarily assumptions on what has propel this to happen, when you do not care too much, things are easier to handle.
1. Focus on what You Have to DoBe it studies or meeting your sales target. Set your priorities right, and don't waste time thinking of the unnecessary. You can think for the whole day and waste your life away bit by bit, and the situation remains. Don't waste your energy.
This is like first principle to follow whenever something hits you, focus on what you have to do. Do not let another person's action determine your mood and thwart your plans.
2. Taking on an Initiative RoleSo, the person just cut you off and despite all the reasoning going on in your head, you just couldn't figure out why would he/she want to do that. You can contact him/her, hunt the person down and ask him/her the big WHY. It seems as though you are overdoing it, looking it from another perspective, the cutter might be the one who is overdoing it in the first place by cutting you off. Confrontation might seems scary and too much to stomach at times, don't be frightened by the thought of confrontation and the consequences that follows. You are merely asking for an answer.
To take on this approach, you must be someone who is not willing to take evasion as an answer, which is good in my opinion. At least, you have an idea of what's going on, be it good or bad.
3. Patience - the Passive RoleOkay, you can't take confrontation face to face, it's alright. The lest you should have is patience. Wait for the person to contact you on his/her own accord. Please do not think that by waiting, the person actually have an edge over you. In the first place, when the cutter cut u off, you
cared and pondered about what has happened and this, already shows that the person have an edge over you. It doesn't matter in this age, who has an edge over who. If this is a sincere relationship, does it matter who has an edge over who? And if this is not a sincere relationship in the first place, do you think anything really matters at all?
And, anyway, by waiting, the cutter would not have know how much you cared. The key is that, please do not wait in misery. You are just merely waiting for something that might have a conclusion, so wait till it is concluded, you should have be waiting for it in misery.
Man is generally quite forgetful, I really do not think that who is able to ignore who forever, of course unless, their paths do not cross again.
Usually I would have encouraged 'the cut' to contact the 'cutter', as you might not know the real reason behind him/her being MIA, and definitely by guessing, you are seldom or never right. They could have just gone missing because they are going through a rough patch, putting themselves in isolation. Of course, they could have gone missing simply because you are a pest. So do try to find out reasons behind his/her action, that's a basic concern for people around you. Here, if the cutter still refused to contact you, then just let things be. If everything else fails, always remember that time can take care of it.
If only
one person went missing in your life, most probably the problem lies with the cutter. Otherwise, you need to do some self-reflections. Heehee :D
Labels: Problem Solving, Relationships
